@SolelyB: My husband is going to be so surprised when he finds out the woman I've been sleeping with is way hotter than his girlfriend.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jwoodham: Reports are indicating that Ivanka Trump may take on some roles of the First Lady. Still no word on who will handle the duties of President.
@WilliamRodgers: "My mind is telling me nooo... But my body... My body's telling me yesss...BABY" Cashier: Sir...would you like fries with that or not?
@BadJordon: Autocorrect just changed 'so thirsty' to 'sloth irate' and I'm slowly getting angry about it.
@jaimekessel: Instead of a flower girl, I want a parmesan boy to sprinkle cheese down the aisle at my wedding