@Swishergirl24: My husband picks fights with me like he doesn't even value half of all his assets.
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@Dschnoeb: I think the only girl I know that hasn't said "you're like a brother to me" is my sister.
@SamDelanche: I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant but apparently it just changes the color of the baby.
@aka_fatman: Hamburgler: Success! Look at this amazing haul of these McDonald's burgers! Hamburgler's Mum: *sobbing* Your brother is an architect.