@khook32: My husband really loves our new couch. In fact, he loves it so much he called me his exwife's name just so he could sleep on it.
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@AntozWolf: I would have loved to have been there when Mary and Joseph tried to explain to Jesus where babies come from.
@myonlymizztake: I wish Adele would hurry up and put out another album so I could end this relationship.
@Rollmaninoz: Boss: ok just bear with me *I growl and start clawing the air* B: wtf are you doing Me: I..You said.. B:first ‘snail mail’ now this..Just go
@TheBoydP: Not to brag but a girl at this party said I look like the Hulk, of course it was when I was turning green from drinking too much, but still…