@mamatomy3: My husband wants a fourth child. I hope his new wife will be good to my three.
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@UnFitz: [speed dating] Me: Periods. Her: Huh? Me: Do they go inside the quotation mark or outside? Her: In the US or the UK? Me: Let's get married.
@NicestHippo: Why are cops the only ones who get to go undercover? Why can't a dentist? Coming soon, Undercover Dentist
@SexyInsomniac: I still use my laptop to tweet. Also, I ride my horse through the shire to get to the blacksmith.