@shimmala: My kids are gonna be super disappointed when they find out sweet talk involves no exchange of tangible confectionary goods.
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@SgtButtCheeks: My 4yo son just asked what squirrels eat. I answered nuts. We laughed so hard, hugged, and gave each other a high 5. My boy.
@Mindless4Miles: DJ: "MARRIED PEOPLE IN THE CLUB TONIGHT MAKE SOME NOOOIISE!" *Groans* *Sobs* *sighs* *a solitary gunshot*
@TheMichaelRock: CW: I spent all weekend raking leaves. Me: I don't rake. CW: Leaves will kill your grass! Me: I wonder how grass survived before humans.
@AynRandy: this year i WILL investigate all suspicious noises instead of merely saying "must have been the wind" and returning to my patrol route