@TwoSapphiresBlu: My kids are teenagers, and I've found the same thing fixes their bad moods as when they were toddlers: a snack and a nap.
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@XplodingUnicorn: My 5-year-old refused to eat her dinner because Netflix was running slow. At least she picked a worthy cause for her hunger strike.
@peachesanscream: Accordion to research, 9 out of 10 people don't notice when you replace words with random musical instruments.
@murderbytweets: In Hell, someone is constantly vacuuming while you're trying to explain directions to an old man.