@MarioInAZ: My kids are young, so when they listen to old school music they think its new. They are currently listening to a hot new band called Queen.
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@abhorrent_wife: Volunteer me to do something without checking with me first so I know whose mailbox to leave the dead squirrel in.
@shhrugg: If I was hanging off a cliff for my life and you told me to take your hand I would stop screaming to tell you I'm afraid of intimacy
@MarieColette: Get a hair cut, run away without paying. They can't chase you because they're holding scissors. The perfect crime.