@redthe1: My kids don't even know they have a grandma that gives them $100 on their birthdays
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@geekysteven: Science fact: If you took a human intestinal tract and stretched it from the Earth to the Moon, you would definitely get fired from NASA.
@JediGigi: Him:You married? Me:Aww You think I'm that pretty? H:Ma'am just filling out your pape- M:SO I'M UGLY? H:I'll tell the therapist to hurry