@UNTRESOR: My milkshake brought a colony of extremely aggressive fire ants to my yard. :(
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@amandajpanda: I am now referring to my parents as numbers like you guys refer to your kids. 72 & 70 are coming to visit, send wine.
@david8hughes: The movie 'Up' is utter bullshit. I tied 57,000 balloons to my house & my wife didn't die.
@Illuminati_Stop: "WATERMELON" HAS 4 SYLLABLES. "ILLUMINATI" HAS 5 SYLLABLES. THAT'S PRETTY CLOSE. WATERMELON IS ILLUMINATI.
@StarksWeek: "Bluetooth or crazy" - is a guessing game I play when I see someone talking to themselves on the street. I usually guess wrong.