@StellaGMaddox: My minivan is always rocking, but it's usually because I'm trying to smack one of the kids in the backseat while I drive.
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@briangaar: *turns down the lights* Girl this is going to be a magical night *dumps legos on bed* ok first we need to separate these by color
@BambamVictoria: My boyfriend said to surprise him for his birthday so I moved all my stuff into his house while he was at work.
@truegritrumble: I once dated a girl so my pet rock wouldn't be embarrassed after he threw himself at her window.
@AmishPornStar1: Interviewer: Tell me about your future plans. Me: You mean, like, just tomorrow, or for, like, the whole weekend?