@scorpicpanda: My mom likes to call from baseball games just to say she can't hear me 25 times.
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@BlindChow: [breakfast in hell] STALIN: Toast is burnt POL POT: Eggs are rotten HITLER: I hate the juice STALIN: Oh here we go HITLER: I said JUICE
@disaster_dog: if there were a zombie apocalypse i'd save a lot of kids but it would be only because i'd need them later to feed zombies so i can run away
@milehighocd: Don't take a shower when you're drunk. The curtain does not support you when you fall. Trust me.