@JediGigi: My Mom taught me to treat others the way I want to be treated so I always walk up to strangers and spray canned cheese in their mouth.
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@roadkill3x: I thought I saw a coyote in the yard tonight but I couldn't tell because it didnt have an anvil.
@onelongbender: Dave is coming over. "Dave Wilson or Dave who thinks he's Spider-Man?" [loud thud on the roof] BACK DOOR IS OPEN, DAVE
@RxitWounds: POLICE! OPEN THE DOOR! What's the magic word? [Cut to them back at the station staring at a chalkboard with dozens of words crossed off]
@thomas_violence: windows 8: i got some updates me: cool windows: i have to restart me: okay not now windows: im going to me: please dont windows: lol