@RowdyBerger: My mom thought my laptop on the floor was a scale. My mom weighs 800 dollars
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@DebasaurusRex: I won't be gratified sexually until someone dumps one of those big Gatorade containers on me after.
@DarkerWillow: My husband thinks it's really weird I only like green bananas and I think it's really weird I have a husband.
@Black__Elvis: Damn girl, are you a Snickers bar because you're so sweet and satisfying and surprisingly hard and hold on, are those nuts?
@EndhooS: [Opens hand sanitiser] ＳＵｂｍｉＴ ＹｏＵｒ ＳＯｕＬ ｔＯ ＥｔｅｒｎＡＬ ＨｅＬＬ ｆｉＲｅ [closes lid] wtf? [looks at label] LINDA YOU BOUGHT HAND SATANISER AGAIN