@subtleapt: My mother always told me "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all"...and some people wonder why I'm so quiet around them.
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@Book_Krazy: Me: *excited* I bought a bunch of Christmas carbs just like you said! My boss: You mean Christmas cards? Me with doughnut glaze all over my face: what My boss: what
@Robert_Beau: The reason that there are so many tweets about cats is that people with dogs go outside.
@PajamaStew: Me to Copilot: Does "d73H" mean anything to you? Copilot: Hmm... No. Why? Me: That nerd down there on the beach seems to think it does.
@Tmoney68: My dancing style can best be described as "Guy On Maury Who Just Found Out He Isn't The Father."