@Brianhopecomedy: My mother-in-law talked non-stop while we watched Criminal Minds and now I have an idea for a cool new episode.
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@Naked_Wombat: 9: You like Twitter Dad? Me: Yep 9: I'll join and be your friend. M: Cool, extra math is great! 9: It's a math thing? M: yep 9: nevermind
@hazelmotes1: Ladies, you should know that if I invite you to a movie I'm only after one thing: someone with a big purse I can store all my snacks in.
@RandomManik: Everything brightened up when you came into our presence. - Food in my refrigerator.
@LipLush1: 911: what's your emergency? me: I taught my Dad how to text 911: the problem ma'am? me: he CALLS to say "yeah, got ur text"