@amishschool: My mother talks into the phone like a combat soldier calling in air support.
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@taylorhosey1: How can people get engaged after dating less than a year? You haven't seen their fall wardrobe yet and tbh it could be a deal breaker
@philco816: *hands stranger a condom S: I don't need this Me: Yes, you do. I saw the way you pulled out of your driveway. Your pull out game is weak
@JennyJohnsonHi5: The new neighbors moved in today. I brought them a box of condoms to show how much I don't want anymore children living on our street.