@bingowings14: My mum tells me that she turns the internet off when she goes to bed, incase you're wondering why your screen just went blank.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jazmasta: "Ugh! Dave is coming to dinner" "Wait, Dave Jones or Dave who impersonates police cars?" [long silence] [hears faint sirens in the distance]
@KateWhineHall: Just finished up some dusting. And by dusting I mean I blew on a shelf and then sneezed 6 times in a row.
@mdob11: Me: WHY DID YOU EVEN COME HERE IF YOU DIDN'T WANT TO BE WITH ME!! Him: Ma'am please just take your pizza.