@AnitaAlibi: My neighbor called my dog fat the other day. Took me two hours to convince my dog that he just had thick fur.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@TheDairylandDon: I don't believe in Bigfoot; because he never believed in me. I'd scan the crowd at my ballet recitals, and always see that one empty seat.
@ComedicBust: Does anyone know the life span of a honey baked ham? Please say 6 months. Never mind, I'm just gonna pretend everything's going to be ok.
@Book_Krazy: "Whoa nice car" Thanks. I dropped 40K on a new set of wheels [whispers to friend] "What kind of idiot spends $40,000 on tires"
@JermHimselfish: I wasn't entirely comfortable slaughtering that goat under the light of a full moon but grandma's gravy recipe was very specific.