@StoferComic: My neighbor just planed an orange tree. I told him, "That's a strange color for a tree."
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@Arrogant_Twat: My doctor told me to start killing people. Well not in those exact words. He said I need to reduce the stress in my life. Same thing.
@NotARatsAss: My night was going great until a neighbor flew their drone over my property. So I grabbed my shotgun and yelled, "Pull!"
@huntigula: why pay kristen stewart millions of dollars when a cardboard cutout of kristen stewart will give the exact same performance for free