@Ms612: My neighbors are drunk & climbing up the balcony. Or possibly being robbed. Whatever.
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@mugkip: "DOC TELL ME STRAIGHT" doc: u got lou gherrigs disease *cops barge in* ur under arrest "FOR WHAT" cop: mr gherrig reported a missing disease
@matt___nelson: Shoe store employee on phone w/ wife: "Yea honey I should be home just in time for dinner" *centipede walks in* "You've got to be kiddin me"
@jazmasta: They laughed at me when I bought Velcro sneakers but no one will be laughing when the great shoelace drought of 2044 comes