@causticbob: My neighbours are loud and obnoxious. Now I know how Canada feels.
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@CatherineLMK: A study was just published that shark attacks happen most often in water. Now I have to worry about the ones that occur elsewhere.
@Phook75: Looking at our latest Comcast bill and I can only pray that our daughter has zero aspirations for college
@mrjohndarby: [waking up on sunday morning] me: ugh, I can't believe what I did last night *looks around to see piles of perfectly folded laundry*
@sageboggs: GARY JOHNSON: let me debate, i wanna debate, lemme lemme MODERATOR: FINE! how will you deal with big banks JOHNSON: like...river banks, or