@realHamOnWry: My nephew asked, 'Do you have a New Years hangover today?' I said, 'No. Hangovers are for people who stop drinking'.
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@TheDreamGhoul: if u think ur house is haunted get a cat. whooshing sound? it's the cat. hear footsteps? def the cat. unseen being devouring your soul? cat.
@shariv67: Got so wasted last night, had to take a train home. And now I can't figure out how to return it.
@KateWhineHall: I cleaned off the top of my desk so I'd feel like I accomplished something. Now I just have to clean up the floor where I threw everything.