@BoozyMusic: My new cat, John Cena, wants me to remind y'all to never let your kids name your pets.
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@SocialustGal13: News is reporting a nun just had a baby. It's official, a nun is getting more action than me.
@chrissyteigen: I really really really really clearly am not a PC type of gal but I'm a little weirded out at the oriental dressing option on my flight
@ericsshadow: [eulogy] "Before we get started I'd like to ask Jenny, Dawn, Rachel, the deceased's 2 sons and the entire front row to put down your phones"