@trumpetcake: My new coloring book, How To Tell The Woman You Love You've Been Living In Her Shrubs For A Year, comes out on tUESsdhay martha i love you
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@CulturedRuffian: INTERVIEWER: What are your skills? BATMAN: I right things. I: What do you write? B: I Right People's Wrongs. I: Oh so you're an editor?
@mynameisntdave: MOBSTER: *cracks knuckles* ME: that supposed to intimidate me? *his fingers start to glow like glowsticks* ME: k I'm scared but thats rad