@Not_From_Troy: My new diet consists in killing anyone who tells me I'm fat.
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@GVNGMiami: Biden: Maybe we make our own country and he won't be invited Obama: Joe Biden: And MAYBE THIS TIME WE CALL IT THE BLACK HOUSE RIGHT BARACK
@AJslackie2: 2007 social media: wow connected with an old friend from high school 2017 social media: the cheese smoked gouda is linked to racism
@chuuew: [Bank] COP: [through megaphone] LET ONE OF THE HOSTAGES GO ROBBER: Okay, who wants out? ME: [spinning on bosses chair] I'm comfortable.
@jdforshort: A random guy held the door & paid for my Cinnabon roll at the truck stop today He doesn't know it, but this is the best date in a long time