@vodkachrome: My next relationship will be with someone who thinks "Wine" is a perfectly acceptable answer when he asks what's for dinner.
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@KevinFarzad: If you love someone let them go. If they come back they probly forgot their keys or something & yikes that's gonna be an awkward 30 seconds.
@junejuly12: [Coffee line] *Sees cute barista* *Twirls hair* No whipped cream please *Sees his backward sunglasses* *Drops hand* Never mind. Load it up.
@bobvulfov: FBI AGENT: [lifting crime scene tape and walking in] dale howard, fbi ME: [following him] bob vulfov, looking for a bathroom
@PuncherJetpack: "Hey bro shotgun this beer" No I don't drink "You wanna be cool don't you?" I don't drink "C'mon NERD!" Grandma PLEASE stop