@TequilaTears: My nickname for my mother is Hannibal Lecture.
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@elle91: I wish I had the confidence of my mom explaining Instagram to her friend 5 minutes after I told her what Instagram was.
@notalogin: God never gives you more than you can handle. But I'm not God. I'm just a bag boy. And you'll wanna take these groceries out in the cart.
@DaHess1: I have an outstanding credit score and even know a dude named Tanner but I'm still not white enough to drink pumpkin beer.