@TequilaTears: My nickname for my mother is Hannibal Lecture.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Tmoney68: 11:30 - Sit on toilet, open Twitter. 11:54 - Try to stand, fall to floor with numb legs. 11:55 - Get comfortable on floor, open Twitter.
@WilliamAder: Drove a wedge of suspicion today between the fast food employee at the first window and the one at the second.
@better_off_dad: I could tell by her screams this was not the kind of friendship that included showers.
@nbadag: "my god, that man is trying to snatch her purse!" i'll be RIGHT back *ducks into phone booth* *pops head out 5 mins later* is he gone yet