@Dutch_50: My One A Day multivitamins actually have directions on the bottle - "Take one multivitamin daily." Hmmm
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@InternetHippo: JESUS: I am the way, the truth, and the life ME: This guy is definitely an only child
@aka_fatman: "What does your mother do for a living?" "She sells shesells...I mean...Sea sells sea shells...dammit! She's...a beachside entrepreneur."
@dril: ive decided that nudity is acceptable if irt's done for artistic reasons, like, promoting a mattress store,
@EndhooS: GF: I'm leaving you Me: WHAT? WHY? GF: You're too afraid to take risks Me: [Softening Doritos under a tap before eating them] THATS BULLSHIT