@Dawn_M_: My online boyfriend loves me so much that once I put my money in his PayPal account he is coming to visit me.
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@Midgetspar: After 9 months and 347 pics of you being pregnant you REALLY only need to post one pic of the baby as proof. We believe you.
@KyleMcDowell86: A cop pulled me over because he thought I was talking on a cell phone but really I was just rubbing a slice of pizza on the side of my face
@AimeeHelene1: *goes in fridge; makes sandwich* *grabs beer* *sits on couch; turns on TV* Him: Ma'am, this is an open house Me: I need the full experience