@lisaxy424: My parents have been together for 40 years, and I don't even like seeing the same cashier twice in a row at the grocery store.
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@randomnloveit: If they could bottle how good it feels to take off your bra, that would sell for more than any expensive wine.
@HatfieldAnne: Admit it, no one really knows how to use the memory function on a calculator. We’re all just too embarrassed to ask now.
@CelebrityChez: Just realized after two years that my boss is actually a grapefruit covered in ramen noodles with peanut eyes. Still very afraid of him.