@HallpassCanada: My phone dies quicker than the black guy in a horror movie.
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@Birdhumms: You want to make them feel welcome but not so much that they'd want to come back any time too soon. Socialising is hard.
@RandomManik: My school always awarded dictionaries to the spelling bee winners. Which was weird because it should actually be awarded to the losers.
@SamGrittner: *job interview* "So this yearbook isn't your resume?" "No. I'm not a moron. Those are my references. I highlighted all the NEVER CHANGE's."