@HallpassCanada: My phone dies quicker than the black guy in a horror movie.
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@david8hughes: "Despite my best efforts, my hot air balloon just isn't going to fly." "Dude, that's a bike with a blanket on it." "My best efforts."
@P1ssed_K1d: I took my family out to an authentic Vietnamese place. My wife and I had pho. The kids sewed Nikes for 14 hours and were beaten. Great pho.
@MelKassel: *night falls, the full moon rises* ME: go, please! i don't want you to see me...like...this HIM: omg what's happening ME: *asleep by 10 pm*