@schumoo: My plans for world domination will have to be put on hold while I try to open this package of batteries.
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@iamspacegirl: A man is knocked out during a robbery.His wife and children are brutally murdered- Pixar: Gee it's kinda dark ...Ok a FISH is- Pix: YES.
@SteelCityDawn: Bought $200 sunglasses. Lost them in 15 minutes. Bought Walmart sunglasses. Had them for 238 years.
@AimeeHelene1: CW: Aimee, could I get your signature on this agreement? Me: *pauses* (with Cheeto stained lips) *kisses paper* CW: Me: That's my signature.