@notfaizzy: my Playstation got stolen... i have no one to console me.
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@FSUSteve: My mom just replied to my text with "K." Whooooaaa busy lady, is there some emergency over on FarmVille?
@RobDenBleyker: "Poor" is an odd word because when you put it in front of "people" it's sad but when you put it in front of "bladder control" it's hilarious
@BackrowSeats: The toughest part of a job interview is finding the exact right moment to go in for the kiss.