@WritePlay: My proctologist gave me two thumbs up. Which I did not appreciate.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@lawblob: if you love something set it free. except Shamu.. we all love Shamu but he must be imprisoned forever
@AmishPornStar1: Me: Ooh, I'd love to go to your party, but I have a dentist appointment. Her: On a Saturday night? Me: I've got really bad teeth.
@JCWisdomNuggets: I carry two crickets around in a small box so when I say something that isn't funny I can supply my own sound effects. They get real tired.
@thestlouisan: My 5 year old just ended a phone call with "I gotta jump, Daddy. I'm out." And now everyone in my house is officially cooler than me.