@sirrruh: My secret ingredient is letting somebody else cook.
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@prontopup: "'Earth' without 'the' is just 'ar'." - Pirates If you haven't seen "Earth without art is just eh" then you prolly didn't like this tweet.
@PULPKetchup: First they came for the Fight Club members, but I said nothing, because...you know...rules.
@gavinpivott: I was in a flash mob once. We'd mainly just hold people at gunpoint until they updated their Adobe.
@BonaFideIntent: Drunk Draft Folder Contents: "Trees. LOL." "I was born once. Pickles." "Spice Girls" "Toes. Are on my feet. Both feet. Not just one."