@totalwackjob: My sex life has improved so much I'm thinking of asking someone else to join me...
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Kris_Florio: "I'm so sorry about your grandma passing away. If there's anything I can do, just name it." "How are your resurrecting skills?"
@TheMichaelRock: Breaking News: Radio Shack is closing 1,100 stores nationwide. Even Breakier News: I can't believe there's 1,100 Radio Shack's.
@gruffybeard: 9: Daddy, wanna hear something cool? Me: Sure! 9: *tells story* Me: Ok, well clearly we need to work on how you define "something cool".
@Parker_Simpson: always good to put one of those Apple stickers that comes with ur iPhone on your car so thieves know which car to break in to.