@samalmightysam: My sex life is like Coca-Cola; first it was normal, then light and now zero.
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@meaganbb1: I like when I wear my glasses because then I have four-eyes I can roll at your ridiculousness!
@TheMichaelRock: It's difficult to be romantic when your dog always eats the trail of McNuggets leading to the bedroom.
@simoncholland: The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.