@lwhit_the_boss: My signature move at parties is flirting with a cute guy for half an hour before realizing he's actually a bag of Cheetos
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@UNTRESOR: A person running around with a laptop chasing an unsecured WiFi signal looks eerily like a cat chasing a laser pointer.
@PrincessAlexx_: Sending 17 text messages explaining why you're not crazy seems a little counterintuitive.
@VodkaThursday: Dinosaurs could be a lot prettier if we'd all just admit they had feathers. I mean they would still eat you, but they would do it prettily.
@TheBoydP: You have to love a boss with a sense of humor. Mine just sent me a 7am meeting notice on Outlook and I've never laughed so hard...