@mrjohntofu: My signature move is parking closely to the sports car at the end of the lot taking up four spaces.
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@Playing_Dad: [@ Sunbeam Bread factory job interview] Boss: Your resume says you are "definitely not 3 ducks in a suit." 3 Ducks In A Suit: That's correct
@bigmacher: #IHaveJustEnoughMoneyTo pay my phone bill so I can call my credit card company to tell them I don't have money to pay them.
@slimmy_shady: Did you know that if you squint at a cat and it squints back, it's the cat's way of saying "What the f are you looking at?!"