@iwearaonesie: my signature move is yelling "where in the fridge?!" and "i don't see it!" until my mom comes and finds the applesauce for me
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@stephenjmolloy: [Gameshow] Host: "You are one question away from our grand prize. How do you feel?" Me: "With my hands." Host: "Correct!" *crowd goes nuts*
@EvilPandaX: Anyone realize Dora is always lost every episode? Why is their no Amber alert for her? Is it because she's Mexican?
@philco816: Kids we are running late let's go! *Kids I'm going to count every stair on the way down with out my shoes on.*
@tdwyer618: "Dad, why did Jesus have to die on the cross?" "He didn't do his 1st grade homework."