@mewchainz: My sister said she had strange cravings and an enhanced sense of smell so she must be pregnant, but I secretly thought, "werewolf."
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@Reverend_Scott: Ways to tell a woman's mad at you: 1. She's silent. 2. She's yelling. 3. She acts the same. 4. She acts different. 5. She murdered you.
@EliHansenMusic: I'm at my most immature when girls misspell "cologne" and start talking about how bad a man's colon smells
@Reverend_Scott: I have a great story to tell u. "Why don't u just go write a book" Wow, that's- "Don't u dare say it-" a novel idea. "I'm moving out"
@LilBlueBlood: Stranger adds me to facebook *has a panic attack* Creepy as hell stranger follows on twitter *does victory dance*