@thatguyJA: My son ate all the marshmallows in the Lucky Charms and well guess who isn't paying for his college now.
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@ceejoyner: No human will ever understand humiliation like a dog who happens to run into a wolf while wearing a sweater.
@TodaysResume: During your interview, try ending every sentence with "dot jpg". "How would you say you handle job pressure?" --Not a problem.jpg
@heatherlou_: I tell my child, "10 minutes till bed!" She hears me say, "Go put on a Halloween costume." Why?