@mamatomy3: My son has stolen my iPad to play minecraft. Please retweet this so the notifications disrupt his playing.
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@thepunningman: I see Google have dropped that internet specs thing then? "Google Glass" I know what glass is, Catherine.
@edgarrants: My wife said if she heard me chewing one more time, she was going to murder me. So I stole the batteries from her hearing aids.
@RuinMyWeek: [God & his assistant making giraffes] ASST: Say "when" once the neck is long enough, k? *God is on his iPhone not really paying attention*
@patrickoriley: It's weird to think there was a time when the most data a tablet could hold was five commandments.