@TheTweetOfGod: My son is 2,000 years old and still lives with His parents. #loser
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@dumbbeezie: Give a man a fish he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and you'll have to fix the washing machine yourself with YouTube videos
@yoyoha: I just saw a commercial that invited me to watch more of it on the internet! Bc That's the problem w/commercials! They're not long enough!
@PaperWash: Paul is coming over tonight Paul smith or Paul who puts ketchup on everything? [car pulls into driveway covered in ketchup]
@Dear_Booze: ME: "I'll have a rum & coke." HIM: "I can't serve you." ME: "Because I'm too drunk?" HIM: "No. 'cause this is a hardware store."