@weirdralph: My son keeps running around naked, so I sprayed him with Windex. It's supposed to prevent streaking.
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@ShaneKnowsStuff: Knife > gun because if I pull a knife, you don't know what I'm gonna do. Stab you? Open a letter? Or am I gonna frost a cake? It's a mystery
@Midgetspar: On a scale from 1 to 10 I tell people they're an 11. It's a fun way to let them know they don't exist and they take it as a compliment.