@maybenotstef: My spirit animal died of neglect.
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@TheCiscoKidder: Harness the power of my dog's wagging tail and we could step into a much greener future.
@MartaEffing: When I realized my boyfriend said we should 'break up' & not 'break dance', I was sad, but also relieved.
@withanewname: Oliver Twist: "Please sir, I want some more!?" Manger: "Kid, you do realize this is a buffet?"