@JennyJohnsonHi5: My stepson and his friend are driving around in my car. If he wrecks it, I have insurance. If he plays Nickelback in it, I'll murder him.
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@halvewit: I think my neighbor is very sick. I have now seen him putting no less than six of his arms in his garbage over the past year.
@Reverend_Scott: [several months ago] BEYONCÉ: Kim Kardashian might be having a 3RD baby JAY-Z: How many we got BEYONCÉ: One JAY-Z: Not a problem
@kentgrossarth: My downstairs neighbor thinks I'm a little creepy and that I overstep my bounds. At least that's what she wrote in her diary.