@PhilLaysheO: My stove is the most expensive cigarette lighter I've ever purchased.
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@Writethatdown12: Trainer: "ok, lets warm up 1st....wait, where are you going!?" Me: "tanning bed"
@leehopkins: Anti-gay preacher comes to Iceland. Locals buy all tickets to his event in Reykjavik, and then don't turn up, leaving empty arena. Class.
@KevinFarzad: So when a couple gets engaged on Facebook for April Fools it's okay to comment "hahaha" but the rest of the year it's rude??