@josh___grant: My suicide notes just keep turning into grocery lists.
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@fro_vo: Wife: we have to get rid of these ants Me: if u don't look at them they disappear Wife: that's ignorant Me: i know the technical term linda
@daemonic3: [art store] You do free framing? "With any purchase" Ok, just this pencil and [slides a gun with wife's fingerprints] you know what to do
@FilthyRichmond: Starbucks should have a separate line for people who don't know what they want or how the world works.