@_Promaniac: My superpower is to cross the road safely and get hit by a parked car.
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@sploosk: my roofing company has gone bankrupt. I kept saying "this one's on the house" every time I finished a roof, how could i be so stupid
@JohnLyonTweets: I wish the Antiques Roadshow guy had just told me how much my swords were worth without getting all nosy about where the blood came from.
@mantej: Haters gonna hate. Tweeters gonna tweet. It’s actually pretty obvious that verbs are performed by their respective nouns.